After decades, I have again, got hold of some time, to write anything and everything. Pouring life into the laptop, brought me to the regular wallpaper that never astonished me, however, I knew that it must have a greater magnitude to the two people who were walking down the path in the picture, which is so life-less, and yet, vibrant. These few days have been rough and I couldn’t put my mind on one thing, and it kept roaming here and there, in different areas which were out of grip, and tiring. Deep down, I may know my hidden treasures, but I cannot bring them up to my cerebrum all the way up from wherever they’re concealed. How many times have you asked yourself, what you are doing, what you’re chasing, is actually what you have longed for? It is the most burdensome and yet, effortless question, that you ask yourself every time you stumble upon yourself. And, you endeavour to flee from that strenuous situation, which petrifies you, and makes you question your own feasibility. I am still in that suffocating room of decisions and bafflement. Bewildered, I attempt to answer one of those problems which demand more effort than those sums of Electrostatics or Electromagnetism. Instead of dealing with those questions that always wait patiently to be answered, I make up mind to bury them, deep down in the grave of all those problems that are still unsolved.
Lately, I recalled the face of that one person who resonated my curiosity, during the trip in May. I merely recollect his first name, and his lips that attempted to curve into a smile, whenever his singular eyes met mine. I would wait outside the room intentionally, to get one more glimpse of his visage that expounded so many theories that I could never fathom after reading cumbersome books of Physics, Chemistry and Maths. I knew that I would get four days more to save the picture of his, in my irremovable memory. I knew that I would have no way of communication with that one person, who would try his best to behold me before I went out. Pondering about days without his glimpse, seemed exceedingly excruciating. Now, that I am here, surviving two months of that trip, it doesn’t seem unendurable. Then, I came to an astounding conclusion, that nothing is unimaginable and that, you’ll eventually take decisions, however hard and impossible, they seem to you. Out of the blue, the inflexible answers to all of your questions appear in front of you, and you are freed from that room of puzzlement. And, here I am, writing this, smiling and wandering in awe, with that picture of his enigmatic smile, that has been captured, late in May, in the Occipital lobe of my brain.
Sometimes, I think about what my purpose is. And, the most crucifying thought, that slays every life that has ever sprouted in this body, is that I do not have any singular talent, that makes me different.
I haven’t yet discovered those things that make me singular. Have you? I would love to hear some of your stories in the comments.
Have a great life.
*Feel free to give your views*